Scenario Feature in Open Office Calc

Here is a video I created describing how to use the scenario feature in open office calc.

Split Data in a Cell

Have you ever made a list of names in a spreadsheet and put the first and last name in one cell? Later on, you decide you want the first and last names to be in separate cells. Here is a video I created and posted on You Tube. Hope you enjoy.



For information on:
LEFT()
RIGHT()
LEN()
FIND()

you can see examples and explanations on my blog. Just look on the right hand side for the category the functions are in. They are grouped like they are in Calc.

FORECAST()

FORECAST

Extrapolates future values based on existing x and y values.

Syntax

FORECAST(Value; DataY; DataX)

Value is the x value, for which the y value on the linear regression is to be returned.

DataY is the array or range of known y's.

DataX is the array or range of known x's.

Cells A2:A40 contain the x-values and cells B2:B40 contain the y-values.
Cell D2 contains Value.
Cell E2 contains the formula =FORECAST(D2;$B$2:$B$40;$A$2:$A$40)

Cells E3:E12 contains formulas similar to the formula in E2.

Below is a screen shot of my spreadsheet.

Note: Not all of the x- and y-values are shown in the screen shot.

Adding Just Odd Rows or Just Even Rows

Here is a neat little trick to add just the odd rows or just the even rows in a range.

Functions used in the formula.

SUM()
IF()
MOD()
ROW()

You can find an explanation of each of the above functions on my blog.

Adding just the odd rows.

C1 contains the formula
{=SUM(IF(MOD(ROW(A1:A10);2)=1;A1:A10;0))}

Notice the braces around the formula. You must enter it as an array formula (Ctrl>Shift>Enter)




Adding just the even rows.

C1 contains the formula
{=SUM(IF(MOD(ROW(A1:A10);2)=0;A1:A10;0))}

Notice the braces around the formula. You must enter it as an array formula (Ctrl>Shift>Enter)



Notice the difference in the two formulas above. I have the differences highlighted in red.

We use a 1 in the formula to sum just the odd rows because whenever you divide an odd number by two you will get a remainder of one.

We use a 0 in the formula to sum just the even rows because whenever you divide an even number by two you will get a remainder of zero.

MOD()

MOD() - This function returns the remainder when one integer is divided by another.

Syntax:

MOD(Dividend;Divisor)


Example:

=MOD(25;4) returns 1
=MOD(38;9) returns 2

ROW()

ROW() - If a single cell is selected, this function returns the row number of a cell reference. If a range is selected, it returns the corresponding row numbers in a one-column array.

Note: If a cell range is selected, the formula must be entered as an array formula (Ctrl>Shift>Enter). If a range is selected and the ROW function is not entered as an array formula, only the the first range cell will be returned.

Example 1: The first example will return the row number a single cell reference.

Cell A1 contains the formula =ROW(A7) which returns a value of 7.

Screen shot



Example 2: The second example will return the row numbers of a one-column array.

Cell A1 contains the formula {=ROW(B1:D5)} See screen shot below for results.

Notice the formula in the second example has braces around it. This is because the the function was entered as an array formula.

Screen shot

Format Paintbrush

The format paintbrush is a nice little tool that allows you to apply the attributes of currently selected cell to another cell or cells.

• Select the cell whose attributes you want to apply to another cell or cells.
• Click the Format Paintbrush icon on the toolbar.
• There will be a paint bucket next to the cursor. Select the cell or cells you would like to apply the changes too.

Here are some screen shots of the process.

Select the cell whose attributes you want to copy.


Select the Format Paintbrush icon.


There will be a paint bucket next to the cursor. Select the cell or cells you want to apply the changes too. I did C1 to F1.

Windows 7

Well microsoft is coming out with its new operating system. It is called Windows 7. Supposedly, they are shooting for simplicity. I was one of the unfortunate ones to get stuck with Vista. Microsoft knows it sucks. So what now. I have to dish out a couple of hundred bucks to get Windows 7. Why doesn't microsoft allow Vista users to have a free upgrade to Windows 7? I have never used an operating system as annoying as Vista. For the last time, I want to allow this. That gets so annoying. Microsoft's problem is they are trying to control what the user is doing. Let the people decide for themselves. So, come on microsoft, gives us unfortunate Vista users a break and let us have Windows 7 for free. After all, you are the ones that dumped this garbage on us.

HLOOKUP()

HLOOKUP() - This function searches across the top row in an array and returns a value in the same column in a specified row.

Syntax:

HLOOKUP(SearchCriteria;Array;Index;Sorted)

SearchCriteria - What you are wanting to match.
Array - The array you want to search through.
Index - Row number in the array from witch the matching value will be returned.
Sorted - If TRUE, HLOOKUP will look for an approximate match. If FALSE, HLOOKUP will look for an exact match.

Example:



I wanted to find the number of Highlander Hybrid's sold during the month of August. Below is the formula I have in cell "B22".

=HLOOKUP(I1;A1:M19;10;0)

"I1" represents the month I am looking for. I could have typed "August" instead of the cell address.

A1:M19 is the range I am looking through.

10 the row the Highlander Hybrid is in.

O which is the same as false means I want an exact match.

Frequency

Frequency - This function counts the number of values in the Data array that are within the values given by the Classes array.


Syntax:

FREQUENCY(Data; Classes)
Data - represents the reference to the values to be counted.
Classes - represents the array of the limit values.


Screen shot. You can click the picture to enlarge.



Cells B14:B20 contain the formula {=FREQUENCY(A1:J10;A14:A20)}

Notice the {} around the formula. This indicates an array formula. To enter an array formula you must press the key combination Ctrl+Shift+Enter. However, I would recommend using the function wizard.
Cells A1:J10 contain the data values. I randomly generated numbers ranging form 50 to 120. Cells A14:A20 contain the classes. I broke the classes into intervals of length 10. You can click on the image to see a more detailed description of the classes.

Lotto Number Generators

I have updated:

Hot Lotto Number Generator
Powerball Number Generator
Mega-Millions Number Generator

Lotto Number Generators

I have updated:

Powerball Number Generator
Hot Lotto Number Generator
Mega-Millions Number Generator

Lotto Number Generators

I have updated the Lotto Number Generators

Powerball Number Generator
Hot Lotto Number Generator
Mega-Millions Number Generator

Need Sticky Notes

Need some sticky notes for your computer. ePad995 is a great for this. I downloaded and installed it about 3 years ago and love it. You can put sticky notes on your desktop to help remind you of things.

Click here to read about it and download it.

Lotto Number Generators

I have updated:

Powerball Number Generator
Hot Lotto Number Generator
Mega-Million Number Generator

Lotto Number Generators

I have updated:

Powerball Number Generator
Hot Lotto Number Generator
Mega-Millions Number Generator

Lotto Number Generators

I have updated:

Powerball Number Generator
Hot Lotto Number Generator
Meg-Millions Number Generator

Find You Next Dig with Google Earth

Scholar finds new archaeological sites by Googling.

Indiana Jones's next adventure may well be in front of a computer if Hollywood scriptwriters decide to embrace a new approach to archaeological research in war-torn zones.

David Thomas, a Ph.D. student in La Trobe University's archaeological program in Melbourne, has used Google Earth to safely uncover historic sites in a remote part of war-torn Afghanistan.

Using the free Internet resource, Thomas found up to 450 possible archaeological sites in Registan, which borders Helmand and Kandahar provinces in southern Afghanistan. The decision to use Google Earth was "partly born out of adversity", Thomas said, when a planned field trip was cancelled because of security concerns.

That is great he can use this technology to find sites like this. My only question. How are they going to do anything. I mean the reason they didn't go in the first place was because it is too dangerous.

SUBSTITUTE()

SUBSTITUTE() - This function substitutes new text for old text in a string.

Syntax

SUBSTITUTE(text; search_text; new text; occurrence)

text is the text in which text segments are to be exchanged.

search_text is the text segment that is to be replaced (a number of times).

new text is the text that is to replace the text segment.

occurrence (optional) indicates which occurrence of the search text is to be replaced. If this parameter is missing the search text is replaced throughout.

Example:

=SUBSTITUTE("321032103210";"0";"Hello") returns 321Hello321Hello321Hello

=SUBSTITUTE("321032103210";"0";"Hello";2) returns 3210321Hello3210

FIND()

FIND() -This functions looks for a string of text within another string. You can define where to begin the search. The search term can be a number or any string of characters. The search is case-sensitive.

Syntax

FIND(find_text; text; position)

find_text refers to the text to be found.

text is the text where the search takes place.

position (optional) is the position in the text from which the search starts.

Example:

=FIND("f";"abcdefghijk") returns 6

=FIND("f";"a b c d e f g h i j k") returns 11

=FIND(81;3958362387817) returns 14

LEN()

LEN() - This function returns the length of a string including spaces.

Syntax

LEN(text)

text is the text whose length is to be determined.

Example:

=LEN("JimBob") returns 6

=LEN(Jim Bob") return 7

RIGHT()

RIGHT() - This function returns the last character or characters of a text.

Syntax

RIGHT(text; number)

text is the text of which the right part is to be determined.

number (optional) is the number of characters from the right part of the text.

Example:

=RIGHT("Southbound",5) returns bound

=RIGHT("Southbound") return d

LEFT()

LEFT() - This function returns the first character or characters of a text.

Syntax

LEFT(text; number)

text is the text where the initial partial words are to be determined.

Number (optional) specifies the number of characters for the start text. If this parameter is not defined, one character is returned.

Example:

=LEFT("Southbound";5) returns South

=LEFT("Southbound") returns S

CONCATENATE() or &

CONCATENATE() - This function combines several text strings into one string.

Syntax

CONCATENATE(Text 1;...;Text 30)

Text 1; text 2; ... represent up to 30 text passages which are to be combined into one string.

Example: Look at the screen shot below.

Column A contains the last name of a person and column B contains the first name of person. I want to combine these into one cell.

Cell C2 contains the formula =CONCATENATE(B2;A2) which returns TreyCook
Notice the above result does not put a space between the first and last names.

Cell D2 contains the formula =CONCATENATE(B2;" ";A2) which returns Trey Cook
This result put a space between the first and last name. Notice the difference in the formulas. The second one has " ". Note the double quotes has a space between them.

Another approach to combine several text strings into on string is to use "&" without the quotes.

Cell E2 contains the formula =B2&A2 which returns TreyCook
You can see this gives the same result as in cell C2.

Cell F2 contains the formula =B2&" "&A2 which returns Trey Cook
This gives the same result as in cell D2.

Screen Shot

CHAR()

CHAR() - This functions converts a number into a character according to the current code table.

Syntax

CHAR(number)

number is a number between 1 and 255 representing the code value for the character.

Example:

=CHAR(65) would return A

Here is a screen shot of all of the codes. You can download this workbook. Click on "Spreadsheet Function Files" under "Links" on the right hand side of the page.

Lotto Number Generators

Sorry it ahs taken so long. I have updated:

Mega-Millions Number Generator
Powerball Number Generator
Hot Lotto Number Generator

Good Luck.

NASA Needs Urine

Go in a cup!

"The No. 1 need right now for some of the builders of the nation's next spaceship: Lots of urine."

Hope the are concentrating on designing the rocket as well.

"The Windsor Locks, Conn.-based company building the Orion toilet needs the large volume of urine (about the daily output of 30 people) to work on urine acidity issues, said spokesman Leo Makowski. The memo seeking daily contributions from July 21 to July 31 was not meant to go public, he said."

Now how could that not go public.

Read the full article here.

Unix Error Messages

Funny Unix Error Messages

#25. One of your faux pas seems to have wounded me deeply.. in fact, I’m barely conscious. Please fix it and try again.

#43. “Keyboard error or no keyboard present. Press F1 to continue.”

#76. ERROR 1164 HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU GET HERE

#104. You must be joking.

#137. “The impossible has happened!”

I thought these were good. There are 189 total. Click here to read more.

Linux and World Domination

Linux edges closer??

linuxinsider.com — Microsoft told the world which desktop OS to use, and the business world listened. The innocent little Linux-based smartphone may change all that. As consumers become comfortable with Linux on handheld devices, they will likely influence decisions at their places of employment.

I have to agree with some of the comments on the article. I don't think people would relate their cell phone's operating system and their desk/lap top operating system. Don't get me wrong, I like linux. I actually took windows off my daughters desk top and intalled Ubuntu on it. I've no problems at all. I would actually install it on mine but am unable to because of some of the programs I have to use. I may set up a dual boot one day. Just haven't had the time so far.

I can actually see linux competing with Microsoft one day. I mean if Microsoft keeps putting out crap like Vista, I think people would start considering Mac or Linux more.

Microsoft needs to wake up and realize that pretty and cool effects aren't always better. And MS, PLEASE stop trying to control what the user does so much. YES, I AM SURE I WANT TO DO THAT!! SO STOP ASKING ME!! I know I can turn it off.

Mystery Bug

Experts stumped

The experts at London's Natural History Museum pride themselves on being able to identify species from around the globe, from birds and mammals to insects and snakes. Yet they can't figure out a tiny red-and-black bug that has appeared in the museum's own gardens.

The almond-shaped insect, about the size of a grain of rice, and was first seen in March 2007 on some of the plane trees that grow on the grounds of the 19th century museum, collections manager Max Barclay said Tuesday.

I don't know what it is either. But then again, I am no expert.

Viacom will not Get Private Data

Viacom and Google reach a deal.

However, after the latest development of the litigants backing out, Google will not be required to provide viewing data of the users, which also includes usernames and IP addresses, thus maintaining user privacy. Read the official legalese here.

You can read the court document here

I don't think user's information is any of Viacoms business.

Miss Universe

Crystle Stewart, Miss USA, falls down during the evening gowns segment of the Miss Universe 2008 beauty pageant in Nha Trang, Vietnam, Monday, July 14, 2008.

Apparently this has happened before.

Mendoza said, she is simply looking forward to taking off her high-heeled shoes and massaging her feet.

She declined to discuss her kidnapping, which occurred a year and a half ago, but took advantage of the occasion to call for global peace.

Wow! Seems like these contestants go through a lot.

You can read the full story here

Here is a video. Seems like she took it well.

Women with Toilet Seat

Don't make this woman mad. I guess she gets her way or you pay the price.

Police arrested a couple after the woman allegedly hit her boyfriend with a toilet seat. The woman, 18, told police that she found her boyfriend smoking cocaine in their bathroom and turned on the shower to try and wash away the drugs.

The pair argued and when he refused to give up the drugs, authorities say the woman hit him with the toilet seat.

The boyfriend was charged with cocaine possession and later released on bond. The woman faces a battery charge and was released without posting bond.

Companies Scramble to Stop Cell Phone Trafficking

Cell phone trafficking

It's technically not illegal to unlock the software on your personal cell phone — but the companies are hoping to put a stop to traffickers that they say are siphoning away profits. Led by Miami-based TracFone Wireless Inc., makers of the low-cost prepaid cell phones are suing traffickers in federal courts around the country. One such lawsuit resulted in a criminal conviction in Houston when a man disobeyed a court order by refusing to stop selling the phones.

I'm sure that will change quickly. It seems to that no matter what companies do, hackers always find a way around it.

Fractals are Cool

Benoit Mandelbrot Fractal Art Contest

Here is one of the winners. Maybe you can download some software to create fractals and enter the contest. I remember talking about fractals in some of my math classes. Very interesting stuff.



You can see more of them here

Ska Brewing Company

Ska Brewing Company is located in Durango, Colorado. They have nice art work on their beer bottles.

Here is one of them. It is true blonde beer.


You can see more here.

Lotto Number Generators

I have updated the Hot Lotto and Powerball number generators. The Mega-Millions number generator is also ready for Monday's drawing.


Good Luck!!

COMBIN() and PERMUT()

COMBIN() - This function returns the number of combinations of a subset of items.

Syntax

COMBIN(Count_1;Count_2)

Count_1 is the number of items in the set

Count_2 isthe number of items to chose from the set


PERMUT() - This function returns the number of permutations for a given number of objects.

Syntax

PERMUT(Count_1;Count_2)

Count_1 is the total number of objects

Count_2 is the number of objects in each permutation


Combinations and permutations can be confusing. Let's take a look at the difference.

Suppose you have 9 books and you want to chose 3 of them to give to a book sale. How many different ways can this be done? This is an example of a combination.

Suppose you have 9 books and you want to chose 3 of them to arrange on your desk. How many ways can this be done? This is an example of a permutation.

The difference between the two is with combination, the order you chose the items does not make a difference. With permutations, the order in which you chose the items makes a difference. The two examples above show a good example of this.

Cell B1 contains the formula =COMBIN(9;3)

Cell B3 contains the formula =PERMUT(9;3)

The screen shot shows the answers to each one.

Dangerous Path

This is a pretty cool video. I think I would do it. From the comments on You Tube, it seems to be in Spain.

Number Generators

I have updated all three number predictors.

Excel Powerball Number Predictor
Excel Hot Lotto Number Predictor
Excel Mega-Millions Number Preditor

I have updated the number database and I also revised the code that predicts the numbers. Good Luck!!

Scrambled Word

How about another scrambled word?

oayrdkbe

No Dog Meat

Dog meat off the menu during Olympics

Canine cuisine is being sent to the doghouse during next month's Beijing Olympic Games.

Dog meat has been struck from the menus of officially designated Olympic restaurants, and Beijing tourism officials are telling other outlets to discourage consumers from ordering dishes made from dogs, the official Xinhua News Agency reported Friday.

I would just hope I went to an officially designated Olympic restaurant.

Distant Galaxy

Distant galaxy booming with baby stars

A distant galaxy is churning out stars at a prodigious rate of up to 4,000 a year, new observations show, in a finding that has left astronomers wondering if the generally accepted theory of galaxy formation is actually true.

Our own Milky Way galaxy, in comparison, creates about 10 new stars annually.

Scientists say it is not just the rate of new star formation that is puzzling; it's that fact that the star-booming galaxy dates back to a time when the universe was only about 1.3 billion years old.

I have always found space interesting. If you want to explore around in space, download Google Earth here. After downloading go to "View" and then click on "Switch to Sky".

SUMPRODUCT()

SUMPRODUCT() - Multiplies corresponding elements in the given arrays, and returns the sum of those products.

Syntax

SUMPRODUCT(Array 1; Array 2...Array 30)

Array 1, Array 2...Array 30 represent arrays whose corresponding elements are to be multiplied.

At least one array must be part of the argument list. If only one array is given, all array elements are summed.

I really like this SUMPRODUCT() function. Below is an example spreadsheet. The spreadsheet contains formulas in the Turquoise, Yellow, and Green cells. The formulas for each color are similar. So, I will explain one formula from each color group.

Turquoise Colored Cells
In cell D14 I want to find the number of Ford's sold during the month of June.
Cell D14 contains the formula =SUMPRODUCT((A4:A12="Ford")*(B4:B12="June")*(C4:C12))

The first part of the formula looks through cells A4:A12 and returns a value of 1 (True) or (0) False. The second part of the formula looks through cells B4:B12 and returns a value of 1 (True) or 0 (False). It then multiplies the these results and the values from column C and then sums the products. See the screen shot below for a better representation of how the formula is calculating the results.



Yellow Colored Cells
In cell D18 I want to know how much money I made during the month of June on Ford's
Cell D18 contains =SUMPRODUCT((A4:A12="Ford")*(B4:B12="June")*(C4:C12)*(D4:D12))

The first part of the formula looks through cells A4:A12 and returns a value of 1 (True) or (0) False. The second part of the formula looks through cells B4:B12 and returns a value of 1 (True) or 0 (False). It then multiplies the these results and the values from columns C and D and then sums the products. The screen shot for how this is calculated would be similar to the above table.

Green Colored Cells
In cell D22 I want to know how many cars I sold in June.
Cell D22 contains the formula =SUMPRODUCT((B4:B12="June")*(C4:C12))

The first part of the formula looks through cells B4:B12 and returns a value of 1 (True) or 0 (False). It then multiplies the these results and the values from column C and then sums the products. The screen shot for how this is calculated would be similar to the above table.


Here is a screen shot of my spreadsheet. You can click on "Spreadsheet Function Files" under "Links" on the right hand side of the page.

INDEX()

The INDEX function returns the contents of a cell, specified by a row and column number or an optional range name.

Syntax

INDEX(reference;row;column;range)

reference is a cell reference, entered either directly or by specifying a range name. If the reference consists of multiple ranges, you must enclose the reference or range name in parentheses.

row (optional) represents the row number of the reference range, for which to return a value.

column (optional) represents the column number of the reference range, for which to return a value.

range (optional) represents the index of the subrange if referring to a multiple range.

In the OpenOffice.org Calc functions, parameters marked as "optional" can be left out only when no parameter follows. For example, in a function with four parameters, where the last two parameters are marked as "optional", you can leave out parameter 4 or parameters 3 and 4, but you cannot leave out parameter 3 alone.

Cell A7 contains the following formula =INDEX(A2:D5;3;4)

See screen shot below.

Notice the INDEX function returns the contents of row 3 and column 4 in the selected range. Not, the 3rd row and 4th column of the entire spreadsheet.

Match()

The Match() function returns the relative position of an item in a single row or single column array that meets a specified value.

Syntax

MATCH(search criterion;lookup_array;type)

Search Criterion is the value which is to be searched for in the single-row or single-column array.

lookup_array is the reference searched. A lookup array can be a single row or column, or part of a single row or column.

type

• If Type = 1 or if this optional parameter is missing, it is assumed that the first column of the search array is sorted in ascending order.

• If Type = -1 it is assumed that the column in sorted in descending order.

• If Type = 0, only exact matches are found. If the search criterion is found more than once, the function returns the first one found. Only if Type = 0 can you search for regular expressions.

If Type = 1 or the third parameter is missing, the last value that is smaller or equal to the search criterion is returned. This applies even when the search array is not sorted. For Type = -1, the first value that is larger or equal is returned.

The search supports regular expressions. You can enter "all.*", for example to find the first location of "all" followed by any characters. If you want to search for a text that is also a regular expression, you must precede every character with a \ character.

For this example, please refer to the screen shot.

Cell A1 contains the following formula =MATCH("Jason";C2:C11;0)

Cell A3 contains the following formula =MATCH("Carey";C14:C23;1)

Cell A5 contains the following formula =MATCH("Carey";H14:H23;-1)

Cell A7 contains the following formula =MATCH("Carey";C2:C11;0)

Cell A9 contains the following formula =MATCH("Ca.*";C2:C11;0)

Screen shot. You click on the image for a larger view.

The first range on the spreadsheet is not sorted in any particular order so cells A1, A7, A9 has type set to 0.

The second range is sorted in ascending order so cell A3 has type set to 1.

The third range is sorted in descending order so cell A5 has type set to -1.

Notice the results of each tell you what row number the search criteria is in for that particular range, not what row it is in in the spreadsheet.

Also, when type is set to 1, the MATCH function returns the row number of the first time it finds the name. When type is set to -1 the MATCH function returns the row number of the second (or last) time it finds the name.

Cell A9 has search criteria "Ca.*". This looks for any match that begins with Ca. It does not matter what comes after Ca.

Computer Algebra System

Need a great Computer Algebra System (CAS)? Want a free one? Maxima is a CAS and it is free. I use it all the time and it works great. I haven't found anything it will not solve. It is pretty much the open source version of mathematica.

Here is the link where you can read about it and download it. the download link will send you to source forge.

Maxima Link

Screen shot



And here is another

Chris Matthews

I love this video. Matthews makes Mr. Watson look like an idiot.

A Penny Saved is a Penny Earned

Kan. town hopes pennies saved are records earned.

This town is trying to set world records for fastest time to lay pennies in a mile and longest line of pennies. I'm sure they will do it.

Residents of Fort Scott, just west of the Missouri line, are spending the week trying to break two world records: the longest line of pennies and assembling a mile of pennies in the fastest time.

Members of the Fort Scott Youth Activities Teams and hundreds of volunteers are trying to create a 40-mile chain of pennies _ nearly 4 million _ in the parking lot of Fort Scott Middle School. The effort started Tuesday and will be judged by Guinness World Records on Friday.

I saved enough pennies one time to buy my first excel book. The book was about $25.00. That would come out to 2,500 pennies. Well below what they will need for the record. But, pennies do add up.

Don't Shoot Mice With a Gun

Woman shoots herself while trying to kill mice

But she accidentally dropped the gun, which went off as it struck the floor. The bullet went through the woman's kneecap, bounced off the keys sitting on the belt loop of a 42-year-old man in the trailer and grazed the man's groin before ending up in his coin pocket.

In the words of Seinfeld. "That is one magic bullet."

Vick Goes Bust

Vick owes millions

Imprisoned quarterback Michael Vick filed for bankruptcy protection while serving time for federal dogfighting charges, saying he owes between $10 million and $50 million to creditors.

Vick filed Chapter 11 papers in U.S. Bankruptcy Court in Newport News on Monday. The seven largest creditors listed in the court papers are owed a total of about $12.8 million.

Vick is serving a 23-month prison sentence at the U.S. Penitentiary in Leavenworth, Kan., after pleading guilty last year to bankrolling a dogfighting ring. He was subsequently suspended indefinitely without pay and lost all his major sponsors, including Nike. He also faces state charges related to dogfighting.

Talking about stupid. He had it all and blew it.

Yahoo! Trying to Beat Google

Yahoo is inviting partners to build on its search power

Unable to beat Google in the Web search business on its own, Yahoo is trying a new approach.

Yahoo wants to enlist a small army of search start-ups as allies in the hope that collectively they will be able to stop the Google juggernaut, whose share of Web searches keeps growing.

I think it will be very difficult to overtake Google. I mean, think about it. When you tell some one to look on the internet, yo don't say "Do a search on the internet", you say "Google It".

Excel Calendar

Here is an Excel workbook that is a 2008 calendar. You can easily type appointments. Click on "Spreadsheet Files" under "Links" on the right hand side of the page.

Salmonella

Salmonella victims surpass 1,000

But people at highest risk of severe illness from salmonella also should not eat raw jalapeno and serrano peppers, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention urged Wednesday. The most vulnerable are the elderly, people with weak immune systems and infants.

I wonder what's next.

Great Screen Casting Software

Here is a great program to create screen casts. It is free. It is called Camstudio. I would download version 2.5. It would also be a good idea to watch some tutorial on You Tube to see the settings you need to use.

Here is one video that is pretty good.

Cool Island

I thought these islands were cool looking. You can do a search in Google Earth for "Dubai" without the quotes. They are man-made islands. Here is a screen shot of one of them from Google Earth.

Crystal Skulls

Crystal Skulls Deemed Fakes.



How about this for the next installment of the Indy franchise: "Indiana Jones and the Dodgy Antiques Dealer"?

Less than three months after the Quai Branly Museum in Paris discovered that a crystal skull once proclaimed as a mystical Aztec masterpiece was a fake, it is now the turn of the British Museum and the Smithsonian Institution to find they were victims of skull-duggery.

Don't know if they are fake or not. Probably are. But they look cool.

Google with Lively

Google ventures into virtual reality with "Lively"


The Mountain View-based company unveiled a free service Tuesday in which three-dimensional software enables people to congregate in electronic rooms and other computer-manufactured versions of real life. The service, called "Lively," represents Google's answer to a 5-year-old site, Second Life, where people deploy animated alter egos known as avatars to navigate through virtual reality.

This seems pretty cool.

Stripper Spent Two Nights with A-Rod

A-Rod News

"A leopard doesn't change his spots," Candice Houlihan told Boston Herald. "Good for her. I think she's doing the smart thing. And she'll probably get tons of cash."

No telling how many more are coming out of the wood works to get some cash.

Water Found In Moon Rocks

First water found in moon rocks

A new analysis of Apollo 15 moon rocks has for the first time uncovered water locked up inside.

"Folks said it was a waste of time," said lead researcher Alberto Saal of Brown University, regarding their proposal to look at the moon rocks one more time. "It took us three years to get it funded."

I bet it won't take much to get it funded now.

Mega-Million Number Preditor Updated

I have updated the file for the mega-millions predictor. Download the latest file before the next drawing.

Anyone Missing a Goat or Dog

Goat and dog get arrested.

"If anybody is missing a goat and dog, they need to let us know," Blakely said.

Woman Kills Husband

Woman kills husband with a couch.

A Russian woman in St. Petersburg killed her drunk husband with a folding couch, Russian media reported on Wednesday.

St. Petersburg's Channel Five said the man's wife, upset with her husband for being drunk and refusing to get up, kicked a handle after an argument, activating a mechanism that folds the couch up against a wall.

I don't have a folding couch.

Suspect Leaves Cell Phone Behind for Police

Another dumb criminal.

Forrest City police weren't able to catch their man after a high-speed chase through town, but the cell phone he left behind gave away his identity.

The chase started just before 11 p.m. Monday after officers received a call about people "fighting in the street with guns," police said. When police arrived, they managed to block one car from getting away. The man in that car spoke briefly with officers before speeding away _ and the chase was on.

Windows DNS Bug Fix

Windows DNS bug fix cam impair firewalls.

Multiple reports from users since yesterday afternoon have complained of systems incapable of contacting the Internet after having implemented patch KB951748. This patch makes a major change to the way the operating system handles DNS requests. Specifically, it implements a system that enables source port randomization -- a way to scramble the address from which a request is placed -- as a security measure to thwart malicious users from being able to craft false DNS responses, and thus "poison" the caches of DNS servers.

One problem after another.

Scrambled Word

It's time for another scrambled word.

mhasregrbu

How To Create a Random Set of Data

Here is an easy way to create a random set of data using the RANDBETWEEN() Funciton.

RANDBETWEEN(Bottom;Top) - This function returns a random integer between the bottom and top numbers inclusive that you specify. Inclusive means the two numbers you specify are included.

The example I am using lists the heights (in inches) of females and males.

Cell B2 contains the formula =RANDBETWEEN(54;75)

Cell C2 contains the formula =RANDBETWEEN(66,77)

Here is a screen shot. Click on the image for a larger view.




If you would like to remove the formula and just keep the data, highlight all of the cell that contain the formulas.

Right click on the data and click copy.

Right click on the data and hit Paste Special. When the Paste Special box comes up, make sure Numbers is the only item selected in the Selection group.

See the screen shot below. You can click the image for a larger view.

DAYS()

Want to know how many days until Christmas or any particular holiday? Here is a nice little function.

DAYS(date_2;date_1) - This function calculates the number of days between two dates.

In my example, I am also using the TODAY() function. It has no argument. It returns today's date. You just need to make sure your computer is set to the correct date.

Cell B1 contains the formula =DAYS("12/25/08";TODAY())

Notice: You have to put quotes around the date.

Here is a screen shot.

EASTERSUNDAY() and ISLEAPYEAR()

Here are two functions.

EASTERSUNDAY(year) - You enter the year and it the function will return the date Easter falls on for that year.

ISLEAPYEAR(date) - You enter the date in a particular year and the function will return 1 if the date falls in a leap year and 0 if the date does not fall in a leap year.

Below is a screen shot.

Cell B1 contains the formula =EASTERSUNDAY(A1)

Cell B3 contains formula = ISLEAPYEAR(A3)

Cell B5 contains the formula =ISLEAPYEAR(A5)

Gas Buddy

Here is a color coded map of gas prices. Gas Buddy

Painkiller

Puffer Fish Poison Painkiller.

Sellers said one patient in his mid-50s was in such agony that he couldn't even wear his clothes without sharp surges of pain.

But with shots of Tectin, Wex's patented name for tetrodotoxin, his pain subsided for more than week.

This would be great for cancer patients. I know they go through tremendous pain.

Detecting Alzheimer's Early

A new laser can detect Alzheimer's early.

The only definitive diagnosis of Alzheimer's disease is a brain slice from a cadaver -- which is obviously not much help for the living.

But now a new laser that harmlessly penetrates deep into the live brain could help diagnose Alzheimer's before its most tragic effects are apparent.

The laser is not for treating the disease. Just detecting it early. Which that is great.

Great Excel Books

Here is a link to some great excel books. I have used some of these and they do a very good job of explaining.

Click here.

Bugs Bugs Bugs

Microsoft has released a security update. Make sure you install it.

Microsoft (NSDQ:MSFT) issued four "important" security bulletins for today's Patch Tuesday release, resolving nine security errors that could lead an attacker to gain elevated login rights, spoof a user's account or launch arbitrary code on a victim's PC.

Security experts said that one of the most severe updates contained in this month's Patch Tuesday bundle includes a fix that resolves two vulnerabilities in the Windows Domain Name System (DNS). The vulnerabilities could open the door up for an attacker to redirect user's Internet traffic to launch a spoofing attack -- a multi-platform error affecting Unix and Linux, as well as Windows, platforms, experts said.

Flash Cards for Excel

I have posted a flash card program for excel. It is to help kids learn their addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division facts. The VBA code is not protected so you can view the code I used. I have tested the code pretty good, but there could still be errors. If you find any errors, please let me know.

Here is the link to the file and some screen shots.

You may have to scroll down on the page a little to get to the files. It should be the second file in the list.

Try out some of my other spreadsheets.

Heads Up!!!

Man dumped a pitcher of urine.

A Beaver Falls man is accused of dumping a pitcher filled with urine from the balcony of his third-story apartment.

Be careful when you go to Beaver Falls.

How to Open Microsoft Office

Did you buy a copy of Microsoft Office? If so, here is a short video showing you how to open the box.

Calc vs. Excel

OOo Calc vs. Microsoft Excel

In earlier articles, I compared OpenOffice.org 2.3's and MS Office 2007's word processors and slide show programs. It seems appropriate to round off the comparison with a look at spreadsheets, the third of the core programs in any office application.

I spent a couple of days testing OOo Calc and Microsoft Excel features for formatting, list-making, formulas, and formula tools. Since the range of user expertise in spreadsheets tends to be much wider than in slide shows or even word processors, I considered the programs largely from the perspective of an average user who might require a spreadsheet for home or business use.

There are some features I like better in Excel 2007 and some I like better in Calc. I am waiting for Open Office 3.0 to come out. Hopefully they will improve in some areas. Version 3.0 is due out sometime in September form what I have read. I do agree with the article saying Writer is better than Word. Writer is the only word processor I use. It is very easy to type mathematical equations an symbols using Writer and Math.

Toyota Prius

Third-generation Toyota Prius to sport solar panels

Toyota is not the first to experiment with solar powering a Prius: Solar technology entrepreneur Greg Johanson is already offering an upgrade to model years from 2004 to 2006 that is said to increase fuel efficiency by up to 29%.

The oil companies will jack the gas prices up. I think it is a no win situation for us.

Fight West Nile Virus

A new weapon against West Nile Virus

Mosquito bites can be more than an annoyance. For the unlucky, getting bitten can lead to West Nile virus, a potentially serious illness that the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention says is very likely underdiagnosed and underreported. With West Nile season getting underway, and mosquitoes and birds recently testing positive for the virus from Philadelphia's suburbs to California, the agency is spreading the word on prevention.

We have had a few cases in the area where I live.

Microsoft Prepares for Battle

Microsoft prepares to to do battle to oust Yahoo's board of directors.

Microsoftset the stage for a full-blown battle to overthrow Yahoo's board of directors yesterday when it declared it was interested in reopening talks to buy all or part of the internet company - but only if a new board was appointed first.

They want give up, will they.

Mega-Millions Drawing

The Mega-Millions drawing will be held Tuesday, July 8, 2008. Make sure you try out my Mega-Millions Number Predictor. Go to "Spreadsheet Files" under "Links" on the right hand side of the page. Good Luck!! Please remember to leave a comment if you win any money.

IF() and Nested IF() Functions

IF(Test; Then_value; Otherwise_value)

Test is any value or expression that can be TRUE or FALSE.

Then_value (optional) is the value that is returned if the logical test is TRUE.

Otherwise_value (optional) is the value that is returned if the logical test is FALSE.

See screen shot below.

Sometimes you may need more than one IF() function. You can nest more than one IF() function together. Here is an example of a teachers grade sheet that wants to place a letter grade in column B based on the grading scale table and the student's numerical average in column C.

If the first logical test is true then it returns the value in A15.

If it is false it executes the next IF statement and so on until it gets to a true logical statement.

See the screen shot below.

You can click on either image for a larger view.

Also, notice the absolute reference ($). This is so when I copy the formulas down for the other students, It references the same table for the grading scale for all students.

You can download this file. Click on "Spreadsheet Function Files" under "Links" on the right hand side of the page.

Blu-ray Recorders

Pioneer to start making Blu-ray recorders

Pioneer's product, which it hopes to launch by the year-end shopping season, will be developed with Sharp Corp (6753.T: Quote, Profile, Research) and make it the seventh Japanese manufacturer to enter the market for the high-definition DVD recorders, the Nikkei said.

You Tubers are Mad

EVERYBODY BOYCOTT VIACOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What remains to be seen is whether fleeting online anger gels into persistent antipathy against Viacom. A great many boycotts are launched, but few arouse enough passion to last and change corporate behavior or policy. Certainly, Viacom is unlikely to abandon its copyright claim against YouTube because of the complaints of YouTube users.

The probable outcome is that Google will provide Viacom with anonymized data, as Google has suggested, and that will be the end of it, at least until there's a ruling in Viacom's copyright lawsuit.

Leave a comment your self. Let's get this thing going. If everyone comes together, we can bring down the Big Dogs.

Round Robin Spreadsheet Update

I have updated the round robin spreadsheet.

• You can now do 4, 6, 8, and 10 teams
• It is now available as a calc file and an excel file

Enjoy!

If there are any errors, please let me know. If there are any additional features you would like to see, please let me know in the comments.

The Runnung of the Bulls

Ouch! I bet that hurts.

The first day leaves 13 hurt.

The Spanish Red Cross said 13 people were injured, with head, rib or other injuries from falling or getting trampled.

It said six were Spanish and the rest were from the United States, Australia, New Zealand, Britain, Romania and South Korea. No names were given. The worst off was a 37-year-old Spaniard with fractured ribs and a ruptured spleen, the Red Cross said.

I would be the guy with the fractured rib. I think it would be fun to go one year though.